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It was late on a Tuesday night, and I was spending some relatively quiet time with my wife, as the kids had all _finally_ gone to bed. It was the first day since surgery that I hadn't had a true nap during the day, and I was bushed. Sitting on the guest bed in our basement, I reached up and over to scratch the back of my head and press my forehead into my forearm -- it's sort of a thinking pose for me.

That's when _IT_ happened.

The following might not be for the squeamish. This is your only warning.

So, here I am relaxing, doing some thinking, when I swear that I hear a little *POP* noise coming from somewhere on my head. I immediately whip my arm away from my skull, thoughts of "What was that?" chasing thoughts of "Keep calm, keep calm" around and around in my brain. Gingerly, I begin probing my scalp with my fingertips. As calmly as possible, I ask my wife, "Say, could you, umm, check out my head closely later tonight? You haven't done that in a while..."... meanwhile, my scalp massage continues.

I'm not feeling anything out of the ordinary... at least, I don't think so. Was there a *POP*? Perhaps I really ought to be checking for fluid buildup... if a hole opened up somewhere, I'd expect a fluid pocket to begin filling. For the next fifteen minutes, I'm trying to casually check to see if anything is getting a bit swollen in my face, my temples, my forehead, behind my ears. What's that... I don't remember that... oh, it's the start of my eyebrows. Well, what about this? My goodness! What is THIS squishy lump?? Oh, it's the same way on the other side... just some fat in my face in front of my ears.

By now, I'm calming down, but I have attracted some attention. My wife, who had been busy, has finally looked at me... and noticed that I am feeling up my head. The short conversation went something like this:

"What are you doing?"

"Not much... I thought I heard something, and I'm checking."

"Checking for what?"

"I'm not sure. Can you see anything?"

"Well... there's that bloody spot on your forehead."

!!!!!

Bloody spot? Since when? I don't think anything hurts... now I'm expecting that somehow I broke a titanium strap on my skull, and simultaneously it has popped a hole in my scalp and left an opening for the fluid that will eventually cause me to head back for more surgery...

"I'm going to run to the bathroom for a minute."

Off I went. Thank goodness I replaced the light fixture with a new one... now there's a cluster of three forty watt bulbs, so the light is good. I lean over, and begin my examination. Sure enough, there is a swatch of dried blood in the center of my forehead. That's got to be new! I looked at that area this morning! I gently rub, and the dried stuff flakes off... revealing something bright red. Fresh. I try to swipe it clear to get a better look, but all I seem to be doing is coloring my fingertips. Blood. Eek! It's in my hair, I'm having trouble seeing it clearly... what is going on??

"Honey..."

"Yeah?"

"Could you come look at this quick?"

"Look at what?"

"Well I heard a *POP*, I think, and now there's blood..."

As she bolts into the bathroom, I can see we are now both on the verge of panic.

"Where?"

"That spot you saw... there's fresh blood. I can't really see it well."

"Let's see..."

"Anything?"

"I can't tell, I have to wipe it."

"Ow!"

"That hurts??!!"

"No, my back is sore from today."

"Didn't they open your head a little further back? Kinda' over here?"

"Based on what they've told me, yeah... but what do I know?"

"Oh... hmm, well I can see it better now."

"And?"

"There's nothing sticking out."

"That's a good thing."

"Nothing feels wrong..."

"I agree..."

"You know, it seems to be coming out of a single pore."

"Hrrm?"

"Yeah, kinda like ..."

My mind flashes back. I've heard that *POP* before. At least in college, if not other times. Every once in a while, I would find that sound would _seem_ amplified when something happened on the front of my skull. Maybe because the layers below the skin there are thin, and the skull acts as a sounding board. Who knows. But I know I've heard that noise before, whenever I've had to deal with ...

My wife and I look at each other. We start to smile. Simultaneous heart attacks have been averted. As the blood stops leaking, and the little pore becomes more and more visible, we realize that my great medical emergency was ...

... A ZIT.

D'oh.

'Til the next time the spirit moves me...

# posted by JamesP3325 @ 7:02 AM